Mother Knows Best

If you haven't met my mom, you're missing out. My mom raised seven children and stayed home to raise us. She cooked, she cleaned, she mommied. I know that some of you do these things all the time too, but I have problems maintaining the status quo most days. I feel like my house is a disaster area, and I NEVER have the energy -- nor the inclination -- to cook. I do try to be domestic, I really do. I can cook. I do know how to clean. I was raised by the best, after all.
Most days, however, it's all I can do to stay standing for an extra ten or twenty minutes when I get home from work to throw something together that my children will actually eat. I really just want to go sit on the couch and veg... the rest of the night. I'm totally wiped out. As a result, my unkempt house, my under-stocked fridge and my frantic last minute before bed time "Quick! Do this homework!" drowns me in mommy-guilt. I spend the weekends with my kids doing soccer and playing around, an occasional afternoon nap. I just want to relax. I take a look around my house, and I think to myself, "Man, you suck at this homemaking thing!"

Tonight, my mom was here for dinner (yes, I cooked the whole thing myself -- even if I did have to call Therese to ask how to use the potato bag). As I was cutting the roast and putting it on the serving dish, we were talking about my messy house and my lack of energy for cooking and cleaning. I asked Mom, "Do you think I'm lazy?" I know she'll be honest, yet diplomatic, so I was expecting something like, "Well, I suppose you could put in a little more effort."

Her response surprised me -- and freed me of some of my mommy-guilt at the same time. She said, "No. You are not lazy. Your priorities are different than mine were, but you are NOT lazy." I suppose since you weren't here, you could take that to mean my priorities were out of whack. But I knew what she meant. I do work hard -- all day. When I get home, I want to be with my kids relaxing and having fun together. I don't want to spend that time cleaning and cooking and yelling at them to get their homework done. That's not quality time.

I know it's not permission to just let everything go come Hell or highwater, but it's nice to know my mom thinks I'm a good mom too. Thanks, Mom!